Life – A Tearing Smile or Smiling Tears???


165915_545135485519361_922131992_nOnce I was drowning in a relationship breakup when someone holds me up. Says you are not what you are pretending… you are strong enough to take a start again. Hold my hand with filling the gaps between my fingers and take me to a green world.

Where there were worries like making assignments, overnight university


me and my husband (Afaq) amusing each-other

projects,  overnight studying to take some extra points, not having enough pocket money for hunting a large-extra topping pizza with salad instead of medium-normal without salad, having late for class, walk for some extra miles for not having enough petrol in motorbike, being wet in sudden heavy rain on motorbike, forget to text back, hiding in a cupboard for not having to be seen using cotton buds, dishwashing after a tired university assignment, making breakfast and making sure that egg was not stuck to the frypan.


me – the author

And we had joys like bunk classes and went to parks, took extra holidays for going to meet family on festivals, buying corn-on-cob between the road and enjoying the horns behind you, enjoying drizzling like a flying bird (while on motorbike), a couple of minutes nap by putting my head on his back (while on motorbike), singing loudly while coming back from university, saved pocket money and went for a movie with cheesy pop-corn and one large soft-drink with two straws, video chat with family on weekends, making sandwiches with maggie and fries at 4am and a lot more.

Sometimes you perceive that life has to flow like a morning breeze. But a thunder has to come for a beautiful rainbow to be seen after that. Likewise in our steady happy life, a storm came when I was diagnosed by an apple (tumor) inside between my left shoulder and neck, instead of being placed in my fridge closet…..hahaha

Anyway this was an awful news for my whole family but in this picture, someone again try


University Days

to fill the gap (this time) of my arms. And deadly sure that a rainbow will again cuddled our life. I passed all the process of medical tests (X-Rays, Color Dopplers, Citi-scans, MRI, FNAC and MRI) with my questioned eyes before him. And he was just saying “don’t worry washu (my pet-name), Allah has created us to live with each other, for each other and in each other”.

One of my doctor once told me that I am a being with “a unique name, unique blood-group (O-ive) and unique disease (tumor is benign but location is so critical)”. On the night before my surgery, I look up in his eyes and take a promise from him that “he has to live his life even if I am not there”, this time I saw, first time, silent tears in his eyes but he didn’t say anything, just nodded his head.


Going to his Convocation

Before my surgery, I saw a face (from my blurred eyes) that reflect either a tearing smile or smiling tears – I didn’t understand…. After a 5 hours’ major surgery, I first saw again the same face with same expressions…..with same blurred eyes. But this time, that face express the feeling of winning a world championship…

I was gone through the medical process (pre-tests, operation, after-tests, medication, and recovery) with his struggle, support, passion, faith and endless prayers.

Today is his birth day (24th May), I want to give acknowledgement to him for being with me and being in me (in form of our loving son)… Sait (our son) ties our love-knot more


My family


Afaq (my inspiration) covers up my all relations, he is my friend, my best buddy, my father, my mother, my sister, my brother, my roommate, (once my class-mate), and yes!!! He is my SOUL-MATE…. Afaq!!! You completes me as what I am, where I am and where I will be….

Point-to-ponder is: Life is sometimes, a tearing smile


Birth Day gift for my husband-our loving son

and sometimes, smiling tears giggles it…  


16 thoughts on “Life – A Tearing Smile or Smiling Tears???

  1. Awwww i feel pain in mu neck 😉 love u both may ALLAH bless u every time every min ameen u r lucky that u have afaq and afaq i must say washo jesi tum ko kaheen na milti 😉 love u my both kids ALLAH give u more and more ameen ( washo dubai ka trip is missng graph ) hahaha take care jani♥♥♥

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Washi I m badly feeling jealous of you,
    Not with your beautiful married life, but the way you wrote this beautiful story, as a writer I m feeling jealous of u,
    Stay blessed and make me more jealous with such sensitive and beautiful write ups
    Yours Sharjil

    Liked by 1 person

  3. very encouraging experience written in a way that really touched my heart. I hope you will be further blessed in life and continue in a happy path together with your family. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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